What a beautiful autumn in Colorado!

I absolutely love this time of year, and it's wonderful wherever we've been through the years! Being back in Colorado during autumn has been great, especially now that we know Danny's got a good job starting in a few weeks in a great place (more on that in my next blog)... and since the weather has been so wonderful. 

Danny's been thankfully working with Duane and Lori's brother Rob with some remodeling projects, and I've been helping Mom and Dad with apple picking, baking, gutter-cleaning, leaf-blowing/raking/bagging and other jobs that happen this time of year. I love to be outside this time of year when the sun's shining like it has been. And I swear my cold is almost gone because I've been outside...

This was a fun day with Dad-- After I used the leafblower (THAT'S a fun toy), we filled nine bags from the front yard, and now so many more leaves have fallen that I think we will likely fill at least another nine! (And the piles I've made in the backyard haven't been bagged yet... I'm curious to see how many bags those leaves fill) Even with the leafblower, it's very time-consuming work, but the weather makes it a joy instead of a chore...



My Captain Moroni! (we couldn't find a helmet or sword or shield, dang it)




Danny was the master of ceremonies for our ward's Fall Festival the night before Halloween. I was plagued by a rotten cold that hit hard and fast, so I stayed behind at Mom and Dad's to rest and to keep everyone else from getting sick. We're indebted to Ellen Runyan for loaning us the Roman soldier tunic and sandals!

You're going the right direction!

One more thing about my rainy/rainbow walk to the gym...

The wind started blowing pretty hard during my walk, but I was fortunate enough that the wind was at my back, not in my face. And I had my hood up, so although my jacket was drenched, I was warm and dry underneath it. 

About halfway through my walk, I passed a pair of exercising women who were being pelted in their faces by the wind-driven rain, and one of them said to me, "You're going the RIGHT direction!" 

We laughed and went our separate ways, but since I was already contemplating the wonder of my double rainbow, still bright in the sky, I found her words echoing in my mind... "You're going the RIGHT direction!"

It's easy on the warm, bright, sunny days to feel that all is right in the world. Counting our blessings is a piece of cake on a sunny day. But in life, it sometimes rains on the just and the unjust, as the scriptures teach us and as we all experience occasionally. 

On those stormy days when the wind is blowing the pelting rain painfully onto our exposed faces, it's nice to realize we are walking in the right direction.  And if we have to walk into the wind, we have the chance to turn around and let the rain hit us on our backs, relieving the pain and bringing us warmth. For although the same rain and wind are hitting us and drenching our clothing, our faces are protected from the buffetings around us. 

And we know the rain won't last forever.  The sun will come out again...
...and it will bring yet another rainbow...

Rainbows on a dark morning

I haven't been sleeping well lately-- worrying about... well, everything currently going on with us. It's been weighing heavily on both Danny and me, and I think each of us is trying to carry the load alone.

The other morning, after a rough night, I felt prompted to get up and walk to the gym and hit a class. The minute I started walking, it started raining. It could have been miserable, but I thoroughly enjoyed my walk... because...



...about ten minutes into my walk, I looked up and saw a double rainbow.

I immediately thought of Gma Connie and my "Tiny Gma" (Mattie Clarke), and I was a little surprised to discover tears on my cheeks, although I shouldn't have been surprised at all. These two beloved grandmothers LOVED rainbows, and on this dark morning, I felt warmth and comfort when I saw that double rainbow shining upon me because it seemed like Gma Connie and Tiny Gma Mattie were together, smiling upon me and encouraging me with this beautiful sign from heaven.

Their message? "Everything's going to turn out all right. Hang in there and be patient and know that you are loved by your Heavenly Father. He's in charge here, and He has something wonderful in store for you and Danny!"

The 'doubleness' of the rainbows faded in and out over the next 45 minutes, but the "main" rainbow shone bright and complete the whole time, as the sun rose in the east and the rain came down on me.

Right before I got to the gym, a cloud covered the sun and my perfect rainbow couldn't be seen anymore, but I knew it was there still.  For me.  On a dark morning when I needed heavenly encouragement to keep going and to not give up hope or lose faith.

I'm glad I got up and walked to the gym that morning. I know with certainty that I was following a prompting of the spirit of the Lord. I need to always follow even simple promptings like the one I had that morning to get up and walk. It made all the difference. But I had to look UP to see the rainbow... I would have missed it if I kept my head down in the rain...

Runyan's cabin vacation

Last weekend Danny and I were privileged to spend a delightful three days with Duane, Lori, Stephen and Brock up at the cabin of two dear members of the ward, the Runyans. It was so relaxing-- no internet access, no cell phone service... just good company, three game tables, a bunch of old movies, two wood stoves, and a beautiful (huge!) cabin in the most peaceful mountain setting. We loved every minute, and being with Duane, Lori, Stephen and Brock was the BEST!



Foosball...



Ping pong tournaments...

 

  



 

 Duane's impossible to beat,
so every small victory is a big victory against him!
(I beat him once, but I know he went easy on me...)




Beautiful Lori... it was so fun spending some time with her!  She's beautiful inside as well as outside, and I continue to be amazed at her talents and gifts. She blesses many lives with her incredible musical talents and teaching expertise, and she sure loves her boys!

We slept in all three days.  The cabin was SO cold the first day, but we got pretty comfortable if we kept the wood stoves burning (Stephen and friends cut a LOT of wood the week before and stocked the Runyan's woodshed, and we enjoyed the warmth their efforts brought!).  Friday morning we woke up to the smell of sausage, eggs and hash browns that Lori had ready for us.  Wonderful! And I returned the favor Saturday morning with bacon, eggs and pancakes. Duane/Lori and boys earned that breakfast after a VERY late night Friday in town at football games and (Duane) working hard on a tough carpet job.  So Danny and I were the only ones who got to stay at the cabin all three days.  We sort of felt guilty but loved our little vacation!




Leaving our worries behind was FUN!

 

Brock's such a cutie. He was the air hockey champion of the week and earned a McDonald's ice cream cone (one of my favorite treats of all time) after winning our "tournament"...









:-)

 
 


Stephen's reflexes were/are amazing--He's so fun to play a game with!

 





No internet, but "Bubbles" was a favorite with the guys...

 



Special bond :-)

I am blessed to be able to talk with Jessie and with Abby and Ethan almost every day. Most times this connection with them keeps me going, counting my blessings. I love those phone calls.  Yesterday Abby told me with glee that she will be starting preschool in January. We shared the joy of her good news, discussing some of the fun things she'll get to experience in preschool. Afterwards, Jess told me that she loves watching Abby talk with me on the phone, for we have a special bond that goes beyond regular, normal love between a grandmother and her granddaughter. Today, since it's a tough day for me, I'm glad to know of that bond. I feel it too. What a blessing!

It's one of those days...

You know how I usually write about looking on the bright side?  Optimism and gratitude do wonders on helping us cope...

But today is just one of those days that sucks. Shouldn't suck, and probably really doesn't, but it sure feels that way.

This pic provides a double purpose: it makes me laugh, remembering a very fun New Years Eve with Jess, Zack, Mike and Corey a couple years ago, plus it sort of portrays the "distortion" I seem to be feeling this week. 

I'm glad it's okay to have days and weeks that aren't so great. I hate being in the middle of one, though. But life has taught me that sucky times come and that good times will follow.

Grandpa Danny



(Sometimes one word says it all...)


I have a hard time expressing myself.

In my head and heart, I have important things I'd love to record forever so my posterity will really know ME. But my curse (and yours!) is that I'm way, way, WAY too long-winded. I hate that.

I admire those of you who can just express your beautiful thoughts briefly but so poignantly and perfectly! Maybe that's why I write such lengthy letters/emails/posts and why I talk so annoyingly much.  Because I'm trying to say what's in my heart.

My heart is full, my gratitude profound, and my frustrations might be relieved if I could just write what's inside instead using words that don't quite fit when my time or resources are limited.

We're in such a weird and difficult situation. But the realization that we are so blessed is helping us to recognize that this trial is... well, it's OKAY! We desire SO deeply to be settled with employment, having me finally working on that elusive masters degree, and living in our own home, feeling that delicious sense of PERMANENCE!  Will it ever happen?  Oh I DO hope so, and we both pray it will be SOON! But Heavenly Father's will be done. Above all else, let us be in tune with His will. And let us trust in Him with all our hearts.








I love my husband. So very, very much. What a wonderful, good, upstanding, faithful man he is!!  I loved watching him with our kids while they were tiny, then small, then bigger.. and I still love watching him with both of them and now with their wonderful spouses. I pray I won't ever forget my memories of him as a dad.

And I love witnessing him as a grandpa!  Too often I've had to enjoy our grandchildren without him at my side. So I really appreciate the times I get to see him in that wonderful role. Here are a few glimpses of him with them... I wish I could capture EVERY interaction between them!  I guess I'll keep trying to do just that. :-)

Reuniting with Abby and meeting baby Ethan

At the playground after Grandpa's run

Better than a pony ride!

Mendenhall Glacier 2010

One of my very favorite pics...

I miss that huge, ugly chair! We could squeeze quite a few of us onto that chair... :-) Perfect for reading stories, tickling and the simple joy of cuddling little ones...
(Jess, you DO have it still, right? In storage? Never get rid of it...You'll someday have room...)

Buddies... Juneau, Feb 2010

So nice to meet each other! Gpa Danny and little Stratton, Feb 2010

"Small" acts of kindness...

Danny and I had a great time in Utah last week visiting with Michael and Corey and with other dear family and friends. Hopefully I'll write more about that soon (I wrote already, but our internet connection is often very iffy here at my parents' home, and I lost that post...frustrating!!!). 

On the final day of our visit, Danny received the sad news that he

wasn't selected for a job in Colorado Springs, one that we were SURE he'd get, and the next day he learned that none of the Denver applicants (him included) were selected for further interviews with the FBI. So it's been a rough week. And my poor parents are stuck with us for yet another week... or another month... We are so thankful for them!

We got home Thursday. I didn't feel like going to the gym and working out Friday morning since my heart was quite heavy, but I knew it would be good for me to get some exercise and I have come to enjoy the group classes offered at our local gym, so I went. Even though I was sorely tempted to just stay in bed.

I was one of the last people to show up for class, and the room was already crowded with motivated exercisers and their equipment. I almost turned around to leave, but two women smiled at me and one immediately started grabbing weights for me and the other brought me a mat.  Wow. Such simple acts of kindness... had such a profound effect on me in a time of need. Although I had seen both women in classes prior to this morning, I didn't know their names, and I've never done anything more to them than smile and say hello.  So they had no obligation or reason to show me any kindness on this difficult morning, and they had no idea how deeply their kind acts helped to lighten my load.  They still don't know, even though I did thank them both for their help.  Three days later I am still feeling indebted to them for exemplifying what it means to be Christlike.

Call it coincidental, but when we arrived back at my folks' house Thursday, my mom handed me a small package that had arrived while we were gone. It was from my beautiful niece Jamee, and it contained a touching letter of appreciation along with CHOCOLATES!  She couldn't have known that the timing of her kind gesture was perfect.  She lifted our spirits on that difficult day (and did I mention there were CHOCOLATES too?!!). I have no doubt that she felt prompted to write and send CHOCOLATE right then.  God helps us out through the kindness of others who show they care.  And I am certain that He invented CHOCOLATE to help. :-)  Thank you, Jamee. Thank you!


I could never begin to count the times I've been blessed by the small acts of kindness shown to me by others, be they family members, friends or strangers, but I hope to pay closer attention so I will be more aware of the countless reasons why my cup runneth over.

And I hope to make a more concerted effort each day to live as my Savior would have me live. To look into the eyes of those around me and smile. To lend a hand. To send a card or drop off cookies "just because". To remember birthdays. To give my time and energy to someone who needs a listening ear or a kind touch.  Yes, even to let a car into MY lane in front of me in heavy traffic!

Because we are all connected.  Because we are all family.  Because we ALL need each other, and we're here on earth to smile and reach out to one another. There are no strangers in our lives... just friends and family we haven't yet met.  So let's meet...

My first fourteener!

Grays Peak (14,272 ft)   
(Yes, I took this picture... my family doesn't believe me...I took the beach sunrise pic with the bird too... I'm proud...)

I've had a goal since we got back to Colorado to climb a "fourteener" (a mountain over 14,000 ft high) before I turned fifty. Monday I reached that goal and it was AWESOME!
(See http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grays_Peak)



Brrr! It was cold, windy and slow-going!

Danny and I attempted to climb Grays Peak last Thursday and were turned back halfway up the mountain by high winds in a snowstorm. We were bummed, but the 3 1/2 hours that we hiked still made for a perfect day, and we were determined to make it back next season to try again.


Snow is hiding the view of Grays here. When you look at the next pic of Mike and Annie, you'll see how visible Grays is without blizzard condtions blocking the view!





Mike and Annie (No snow blocking the view this time!)



Well, my brother Mike suggested that we try again Monday since the weather was supposed to be good, but Danny couldn't go. So Mike and his faithful dog Annie and I left early yesterday for another attempt at getting to the top.

View from trailhead. Gray's is the light blue mountain way in the distance. Seemed so far away...

  We were blessed with the most beautiful day we could have imagined-- I wish Danny could have been with us!

Unfortunately, Mike started having some serious breathing problems close to the same spot where Danny and I had to turn around last week, so he and Annie rested while I climbed to the summit of Grays.


Although I worried about leaving him behind, I have to say it was the most exhilarating experience to make it to the top! And the view?!  Well, these pics don't begin to show what it was like. I wish my camera could have captured what my senses experienced... I'm hooked!  I want to do this again and again... with Danny next time. :-)

See Breckenridge's ski slopes in the distance (to the left)? What a view!

The sign says "Grays Peak 14,272 ft". Three guys we met on the trail loaned their sign to me once we made it to the summit. 

:Looking south at Pikes Peak in the distance

stupid game...

Danny and I play Phase Ten often because we love to spend time together and because playing cards is cheap entertainment. We've come to appreciate cheap entertainment these days!

But... sometimes I don't LIKE playing Phase Ten with Danny because HE CHEATS! (see pic...low score wins in Phase Ten) 

Stupid game...

Judge not, and ye shall not be judged...

The other day I was thinking of everything EXCEPT for the stop sign in front of the supermarket and I failed to stop. Not only that, but there was a PERSON crossing and I didn't see him either.  I stopped immediately to apologize. He exploded, calling me an idiot and blaming me for the reason we have to have stop signs in front of supermarkets in the first place. I lamely told him I was so sorry, adding that I usually do stop and that this was not my habit.  He yelled more about how I shouldn't be allowed to drive, etc. Then he stomped away, still yelling.  That incident affected the mood of my whole day, but I think I learned something important from it.  We all sometimes fall into the role of that guy. We may judge others on one incident--without knowing anything else about them and without realizing that our judgment just might affect their day in a negative, maybe hurtful way. I found myself on the receiving end of an inaccurate and hurtful judgment in an event that only lasted a few moments. It made me think.  Thank God for the Atonement of our Savior, Jesus Christ, so that when we do make mistakes (and we make plenty), we can learn from them and refrain from judging others too quickly.

A friend once told me that marriages will thrive when we include the Lord in a sacred "marriage triangle".  You know-- with the Savior at the top point and both spouses at the other two points.  When we look straight at our spouse (or at ANY other person, for that matter), we sometimes don't see clearly.  Maybe our beam is in the way (see Matthew 7:3)? 

But when we look at our spouse through the Savior's eyes (making an angle in our triangle), we are better equipped to see him/her as our Savior sees him/her. And marriage works much, much better with the pure love of Christ as our foundation.  Any relationship works better that way... even an insignificant one involving a stupid, distracted woman who made a mistake by missing a stop sign.

Luke 6:37:  "Judge not, and ye shall not be judged; condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned; forgive, and ye shall be forgiven"

May God hold you in the palm of His hand...

The other day while watching the Notre Dame-Michigan game, a ND commercial came on inviting folks to visit the campus. The commercial used my favorite Irish blessing and some beautiful Irish music to draw in the viewer (it worked), and it amazed me how good it felt to hear the words of that familiar blessing combined with the comforting beauty of the music.


You know that Danny and I have been experiencing a great deal of stress since AF retirement and since the job in Omaha in June never happened and other potential jobs are still in the 'wait and see' stage. It's difficult to not know yet where we'll be in a week or month or year. We feel very unsettled in our lives as our earthly belongings remain in a storage unit for much longer than we had expected.

My parents have been wonderful as they've graciously shared their home with us, and we love them and appreciate the rare time we've had with them after living far away for so many years.  But despite their kindness, we ache to get back to our own lives in a home of our own.  We haven't felt a sense of permanence or ownership for so long, and while we have no doubt that the Lord's hand is in this trial and that everything truly will be all right, the unease has still accompanied us in every waking moment and, too often, throughout the night.

Having shared that, let me get back to what happened with the Irish blessing I mentioned. The moment I heard the blessing and the music, I felt like a weight was being lifted from my shoulders.  The music soothed my spirit and the words embedded themselves within me, and they're still there comforting me three days later. Haven't left for a moment.  I feel calm and at peace, like I do every time we are in the temple, and I know for certain that the Lord is here with us in our trials. I know Danny wasn't meant to get the job we expected to get back in June, even though we wanted it so badly.  I also know that if we get what we think we want in every situation, maybe we'd miss out on the blessings of true gratitude.

One more thing since my post is focused on my favorite Irish blessing:  As it's gone through my head over and over again this weekend, I've found my thoughts always resting on YOU.  Each of you mean the world to me.  I fervently ask my Father to bless you with the sentiment found in the words of this traditional blessing.  So without further ado, this one's to you... from me... with love:

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
The rains fall soft upon your fields
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.
                             (Traditional Gaelic blessing)

I love my family!

There are at least a thousand pictures I'd like to post today as I think about how much I love my family, but Sarah Traut (soon to be Sarah Claeys!) is being honored at a bridal shower in half an hour, so this has to be quick and I'll slowly put all thousand pics on here. :-)  I love this family picture, taken on Jessie and Zack's deck at their house in Utah. It's old now, but still captures the spirit of one of many wonderful days with our kids and their sweethearts and kids.  As you can see by the date on the picture, this is over two years old, so Abby and Ethan have grown up a bit since then, and Stratton has joined the Edwards family. I love these people!!!